Lethargic

I’ve been having troubles logging in, but I think it has got something to do with the excruciatingly slow internet connection. I had a lot to write about, there were times where my soul felt as if it was going to burst. Not in a bad or good way, but I would say in an expressive kind of burst. And I seem to have problems getting myself to read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.. I don’t know what it is, but I get bored, man. I’m surprised. Then again I was getting around to do a piece for my mom, a painting of a hibiscus, or a rose maybe? She did imply she wants flower(s), and I realised it was a bit too heavy for me now. Its just one of those days when I am just uninspired. Well I thought I was, but maybe I wasn’t feeling it enough. I need to get away from painting for a while, and pick up a book and get carried away. But I have missed writing so much (:

This feels so relieving. The kind when you held on to your piss for a while, and then you take a leak? Yeah, sort of. Haha! I really need to get a sewing machine soon. I can’t wait!

On top of everything else, I haven’t bought a single ticket (plane, trains, etc.) to get back to UK, let alone Newcastle.. I have no idea how its going to be like in the next two weeks, but I hope it gets busy. Its been quiet for so long, almost too still, its time for that little bit of chaos. I hope I get that two important calls, both by this week, both with some good news. InsyAllah. I’m going to miss Brunei but hey, I can’t do this any longer. I feel like a rotting log. I need to do something, or I’ll go insane. I need to get back, do something.

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